what's to care when to care requires energy

humans have a daily allowance of energy to expend. society provides hundreds of methods by which humans can unload their energy, and some might be just a little more fun than others. for instance, i'd much rather bareback a hooker than whip myself with a cat-o'-nine-tails. although masochism is probably an effective--and spiritual--outlet. and hell, barebacking a hooker could be viewed as masochism, too; i, however, see it as my attempt to establish my masculine dominance.

for your amusement, a list of vignettes. or really, less than vignettes, but soul-damning lines uttered in my direction.

"out of all the guys i've dated, you've been the only one who was halfway decent," she said, choking back tears. "this guy i've been sleeping with, well, i found out that he was still sleeping with his ex...so i moved all of my stuff out. WHAT DO I DO NOW?????"

"you should probably get tested, and soon...i think i might have an STD."

"god is telling me that we shouldn't be together anymore."

"fuck you! fuck you! i can't believe you hate the sight of me so much that you would [play french horn on the top of mount everest]!* what the fuck were you thinking? did you seriously think that [creating that unholy atonal sequence]* would do anything to put you in my good graces again? fuck you. i can't believe you!"

regarding the asterisk, do you really think i'm going to list my transgressions in that quote? of course not, for i was right and she was wrong. plus, listing such actions would make me look bad, and the commentary i would be forced to provide to clear my good name just wouldn't be worth the effort. so you'll have to trust me here. and since you are here, and you know that i am a good guy, you'll trust me, right?